


used to be just like me and you

by isopsephy



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Future Fic, Gen, vaguely implied Caleb Widogast/Astrid/Eodwulf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-12-18 14:10:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18251432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isopsephy/pseuds/isopsephy
Summary: Eodwulf makes a longed for but unexpected discovery while scrying.set in a nebulous future in which the Mighty Nein have looked out for one of their own in a very specific way.





	used to be just like me and you

Astrid had promised herself she would make her way to her bed an hour ago and yet she was still sitting at the desk trying to piece together a translation of a Xhorasian text when Eodwulf came in and started drumming his fingers on the desk.

“Can’t sleep?” she said only half looking up. 

“Are you almost done? You want to get a drink?” 

There was something wrong with his voice try as he might to sound relaxed. Astrid furrowed her brow at him. He was still tapping his fingers on her desk significantly and she dropped her gaze to watch him trace the letters B R E N.

She looked back into his face certain she had misunderstood but he just nodded very slightly.

“Let me finish this up and I’ll go to the pub with you,” she kept her voice steady but her hand betrayed her by trembling as she made a final note on the page.

They sat pressed together at the bar sipping ale and getting a feel for the noise of the room. 

“Are you sure it was him?” she said in Zemnian.

“As sure as I am that you are you,” he said. 

“Alive?”

“Yes.”

“Sane?”

“Yes,” he sounded almost angry that she would ask.

“Why now? After all these years not seeing him why can you suddenly see him now?”

“You know as well as I do there are ways to hide from scrying,” Eodwulf shrugged.

“Why isn’t he hiding now, Edo?” she loosened her grip on the mug as she felt the barkeep staring.

“I don’t know. I— didn’t stay in the vision long. I just saw him and then I jumped out. He was smiling. His hair is long now.” He was staring into the distance with a lost look she recognized.

“If you stayed in it could you find him?”

“He was with other people. If they talk about where they are—where they’re going,” he trailed off with a shrug.

“We have to go don’t we? Just for a moment,” she said.

He nodded. “We have to go. But—quietly; He can’t know,” he said.

“Ja, of course,” she said. 

\--

It took him several days of scrying on Bren before he saw and heard enough to estimate where he and the others with him were and what direction they were heading. 

“He’s close,” he told Astrid.

“How close?” she said.

“On the road not far from here—heading south toward the crossroads,” he said.

“That is too close. What is he doing so close?”

Eodwulf shrugged, “Maybe he doesn’t know He’s here? Or—I don’t know. Should we still go?”

Astrid nodded, “Tonight, we’ll go tonight.”

They rode along the road taking turns with Astrid’s owl and Eodwulf’s bat to scout the woods around them for campfires. They found a camp of bandits first and then a family of orcs and then Astrid pulled the reins with her eyes still white blank.

“There,” and she pointed. They tie up the horses and hike into the woods bumping each other in an almost giddy rush through dark woods trying not to stumble over roots and rocks until they saw fire light. 

Astrid nudged Eodwulf and pointed at the silver thread. He smiled at her and tapped it with his boot. They watched Bren sit upright and turn toward them. His hand went to his pocket reaching for components with the thoughtless grace she remembered. She watched him scan the darkness until he saw them.

“What is it, Caleb?” someone asked. He glanced over at the voice but shook his head and walked toward them. With the fire at his back she couldn’t see his face.

“Guten abend Bren,” Eodwulf said.

He didn’t respond.

“Do you remember us?” Astrid asked fighting the sinking feeling in her gut. He had responded to the name Caleb just now. He might be a different person altogether; no longer their Bren in any way that mattered. It would be better for all of them if he didn’t recognize them but she might not be able to bear it.

“How could I forget?” he said eyes darting between their faces. With a swell of relief she forced away the memory of the last time she’d seen him; dragged away by two men with his eyes rolled back in his head and utterly senseless. 

He had walked close enough now that she could reach out and stroke his cheek. It was coarse with stubble very unlike the peach fuzz she remembered. 

Eodwulf was bolder (has always been bolder this way) and grips him by the hand and elbow to brush a kiss across his other cheek. 

Bren’s free hand found hers and she felt it like a circuit being connected. Whole again after so long. 

She shut her eyes. She wanted to stay in this moment forever with Eodwulf’s shoulder against hers, Bren’s hand and cheek rough and warm under her hands, and all three of their bodies relaxing toward each other in the nostalgia of being each others only safe haven. 

But the people Bren was with were shuffling and getting to their feet and someone said, 

“Fjord,” in an urgent voice. 

Another voice said “Just—wait.”

“Who are these people?” Astrid asked not looking at them but at Bren.

“My— they’re my friends.”

“Friends?” 

“Ja but they’re not—“

“Are you happy?” she interrupted.

He looked back and nodded slowly.

“Good,” Eodwulf said satisfied.

“Oh liebchen I’m so glad you’re all right,” Astrid said squeezing his hand tightly.

“Stay safe,” Eodwulf said and stepped back. He was still holding her hand as she let go of Bren.

“What? No don’t-“ Bren said. “Wait!”

“We have to go. This is a risk for us all,” she tried to remind him. She summoned the magic to send them back toward the horses.

She caught just the edge of Bren saying “I have to-“

They crack through the door she’d opened and stumble leaning into each other.

“I didn’t expect it to feel so—I’m so glad.”

Eodwulf nodded.

All through the long cold ride back to town she felt that gladness like a small sun rising in her chest. Bren was alive and sane and knew them. He wasn’t trapped away in some asylum or rotting in the grave. He had friends, people he liked enough to travel with, and he had his mind. 

All the horrible situations she’d conjured for him over the years weren’t true. There was a little jealousy prickling at her but mostly it was overwhelmed by gratitude. He was the best of them and he had gotten out. He carried them with him in some small way and Astrid had made a life out of being grateful for small favors. 

\--

She still had the warm glistening bubble of feeling in her chest the next day when DeRogna summoned her and Eodwulf to her office. 

“Trent Ikithon is missing,” she said. 

After the shock faded and she realized that DeRogna was absolutely serious Astrid had the realization that perhaps that was why Bren had been so close to them. If he knew Ikithon wasn’t around to be a threat. But how would he know unless he had—he had made sure that he wasn’t a threat. 

The puzzle clicked together in her mind and just as quickly she forced it apart and dissolved that damning conclusion before it could be read on her face. She hoped Eodwulf would do the same.

“What do you mean he’s missing?” she asked.

“As far as we can tell no one’s been in contact with him in three weeks.” 

“Three weeks?” Eodwulf said.

“You are both aware, I’m sure, that he would sometimes isolate himself in order to work through a problem. Hass discovered he was not in his rooms and raised the alarm when he could not locate him or any indication of his whereabouts. You two are particular-“ she broke off. 

Astrid could see her dilemma. Favorites was an ugly word to describe how he treated them. 

“Did he say anything to either of you?”

“No,” Astrid shook her head. “I haven’t spoken to him in a while although I did not—did not realize how long until now.”

“I have not had contact with him either,” Eodwulf said. 

DeRogna eyed them both and then sighed. “All right well I thought perhaps you might have some insight but I suppose you are no longer his charges and he is not yours. You are dismissed.”

The two of them left the room and moved in lockstep to Astrid’s quarters. With the door shut behind them Astrid fought an impulse to laugh or cry or shout.

“You think he’s dead?” Eodwulf said in barely audible Zemnian.

She nodded one hand pressed over her mouth.

“Now what?” he said.

She couldn’t help the smile as she said “We’re free.”

**Author's Note:**

> I want to meet Astrid and Eodwulf so bad! This is a gentler interpretation of who they might be than I think we'll actually see but I just want them to have a soft spot for Caleb/Bren. And also I want the Nein to fuck Ikithon up¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


End file.
